August 15, 2013 Learning causes changes

I'm learning that as I learn, I change.  I grow, I travel new paths and even change old habits.

As I continue to play with my energy (and yes, I do mean play as it really is fun to pass energy balls through body parts, pull energy up and pour it into my personal storage space, draw energy in and use it for some self healing, and many more little games I play now that I've learned how to bring it out) I'm finding that, first and foremost, I need to pay close attention to releasing it, even when I haven't been consciously playing.

This became clear to me when  friend touched my arm tonight and commented on how hot I was, and I hadn't even been dancing!  Apparently, I'm throwing off a great deal of heat, though my body temperature is, if anything, lower than normal!  (maybe that's why the cats are more inclined to be near me lately!)

I've also noticed that my appetite is decreasing.  It started slowly, but the more time I spend in that energy zone, the less food I seem to require.  It makes me wonder whether it is just something unique to me or if it is something others experience as well.  Does working with our energy field provide it's own nourishment?

Even now, as I'm thinking about my energy field, my skin which was fairly cool to the touch when I got home seems to be getting warmer.  Is it, like the Laws of Attraction, a case of thinking about it, and it will engage?

I also noticed tonight that places which were hurting last night but got some healing energy during my practice session were not hurting tonight, or if they were, the pain was very weak.

I tried an experiment tonight.  My practice work involved using a blue energy ball and passing it through various joints, my brain, through my arms, etc.  Tonight, I used a green energy ball (green for healing) and passed it through my right knee which was really aching last night.  Tonight, it did not ache at all where I'd had the meniscus removed, but I felt twinges on the opposite side!  I believe that with a few more applications of that green energy passing through my knee, I will cease to experience any discomfort at all!  Even my left leg which tends to be painful from hip to ankle in the tendon which travels the length of my leg was much better tonight after using the green energy. 

The only area I don't seem to be finding success with right now is that pesky lower abdominal region.  I'm definitely going to have to spend some time testing various foods for sensitivity, and may have to radically change my diet to accommodate my body's changing needs.

As I have mentioned before, a beloved member of our dance community was diagnosed with Stage 4 pancreatic cancer this year.  She has touched so many and there is a great deal of love and encouragement being sent to her.  As I travel my new path, I've learned that the pancreas is governed by the solar plexus chakra.  Earlier this evening, I started having a sick feeling in my stomach and tried to trace it so I could figure out what it was trying to tell me.  I never did get to the bottom of it, and it is still there, though much decreased.  The only thing I can come up with is that it is connected to my desire to send healing energy to where it will be most helpful to her (assuming, of course, that her guides really want her to receive it). 

To test my theory, I brought her into my thoughts and asked the question.  The answer I received was a very polite, "thank you, but no."  I'm guessing that my sick feeling was partially brought on by somehow knowing that would be the answer.  I know, on a conscious level, that it could mean she has what she needs to heal herself, but my maternal instincts kick in when someone is in pain or ill, and even if we're not close, I feel the desire to help if I can.  I know that there will be plenty of times when I am asked not to help, and learning to accept that without taking it to heart is going to be difficult for me.  I don't so much have trouble with honoring a person's (or their guide's ) wishes, as much as I do having to step back and allow them to suffer, despite the fact that I understand and respect everyone's right to set their own path.

I continue to be tested to respect the choices of others, and especially those I care about, even if I don't understand them.  And more, to continue to send them love and light, especially when I need to step back and allow them to travel their path without outside interference.  I guess that in order to truly help others, it is imperative to understand that what we might consider helping could be considered hindering or interfering by our intended recipient.  Letting go and doing nothing are never easy, but, as with anything else, there is a time and a place for everything.

My gratitudes tonight are:
1. I am grateful for the lessons which are coming into my life right now.
2. I am grateful for opportunities to test what I'm learning.
3. I am grateful for friends who understand what I'm doing and, sometimes inadvertently, offer suggestions.
4. I am grateful for the attention I'm getting from my cats as I continue to learn and grow.
5. I am grateful for the way my world is expanding and I'm interacting more with other people.