October 5, 2011 Monkey mind

So my thoughts are zooming all over the place tonight.  They alight on something like a discussion on forgiveness where I made a remark about Jews inventing guilt.  My brain then elaborated on the thought, and I mentally continued with: Not only did we invent it, but over the years, we've cultivated and nurtured it until it has become an art form of such magnitude that it deserves pride of place in the Smithsonian. 

I then take a side trip to tonight's dance class where I discovered that I can dance quite nicely with a number of the gentlemen there, so spending time bemoaning the fact that I must step away from one with whom I dance so well is utterly ridiculous because there are so many opportunities to dance with men who are equally if not more delightful to dance with!  And I do believe it's past time for me to take my dance instructor's advice and step outside my comfort zone, and really begin to live! 

 Of course, learning that Steve Jobs passed today, and was born the same year I was certainly gave me pause.  He certainly left his comfort zone far behind, as any innovator would have to.  He will certainly be missed, but hopefully, the legacy he left and the people he inspired will continue on.

There have been a number of comments lately about my comedic bent, and, interestingly, I had a dream the other night in which someone was commenting on how funny I was, and I mentioned that I had a vague dream of doing standup comedy.  At some point, after expressing my fears, the person told me I could have someone do it for me.  Even in the dream, this struck me as strange, as how can we have someone else have our experiences in our place?  But maybe by NOT taking the chance, either with a performance or my book or anything else I'd secretly like to do, I am, essentially, passing the ball to someone else, and, as such, they are having the experience in my place.  In fact, Joe's comment today sort of wrapped the whole concept up into a nice, neat little bow.

Now, granted, embarking on this massive remodel is a huge step outside of my comfort zone, and will certainly rock my world.  Allowing myself to be attracted to anyone, even if it was not exactly what I might have hoped for, is, again, stepping out of my comfort zone.  However, it seems that there is something bigger and more earth shaking upon which I need to embark, or I wouldn't be getting all of these neon signs from the Universe lately!  (I'd best be careful or I'm going to start getting whacks on the head if I don't figure this out soon!)  I know I'm going to catch it for this next remark, but I have to admit that MPP is probably right and I need to just let my guard down more and allow things to develop as they may. 

And so, the next step on my path will be to try to step outside of my comfort zone at least once a day!

Love and light.