April 17, 2011

I'm getting into a pattern lately.  I do my ACIM (and today's lesson is amazing!  "I could see peace instead of this" and will carry me through the day.  I plan to keep this in the front of my mind to alleviate even the pettiest of aggravations.) then come here and do my card of the day.  Afterwards, the words seem to flow pretty freely, as I'm averaging about 1300 words a day now!  Imagine what I could do if I was writing more hours a day!

Card of the Day:  Princess of Cups (This is the card I always think of as Heather's card)
I see:  A young girl or perhaps, a mermaid, sits on a seashell in the middle of the sea holding a large pearl. She has a far-away look on her face, and looks a little sad.  Her lyre floats, forgotten in front of her as a pair of dolphins cavorts behind her, her royal guards.
I feel: The sadness comes from a desire to do something which, at the moment is prevented, either by circumstances or parental decree.  She knows that if she waits it out, eventually, if she even still wants it, her desire will come to pass.  But it still saddens her that she is being thwarted, despite any valid reasons for it.
I think:  This, if indeed, it's Heather, could apply to so many things right now.  Finishing school and starting her career, moving into her own place, getting a promotion at work.  She has so many incredible things in front of her, but also, things which have to be accomplished first and I know, at her age, that it can be very frustrating to be unable to be where you want to be right now.  She also has dozens of projects she wants to be doing, and can only do so many things at a time.  Not the least of her challenges is her typical (and I hope she learns to get past it) month before finals stress out.  I know that, this semester, she's been studying long hours, going to peer tutoring to get each area where she doesn't feel 100% sure ironed out, having Mathom quiz her, and basically, doing all the right things, so I have no doubt that she'll do great on the finals, as long as she doesn't freeze up.  But she seems so much more positive about her classes this semester than I've ever seen her!  Like me, she's her own worst critic and her own worst enemy when it comes to succeeding, but between me and Mathom, this semester, for a change, she has her own corps of cheerleaders!  Go, Team Heather!!!!  I know that in a few years, she will be making enormous contributions to the field she's loved since childhood.

I guess Heather and her challenges was on my mind this morning, as the card was really all about her, although, I am at least peripherally involved. :)  She wants to accomplish so much, and sometimes, it's all about reigning her in to focus on less so she can be blazingly successful at all that she's taken on.  She has that wonderful youthfulness of wanting to do it all.  I also wish I could protect her from disappointments, yet, I know that the reality is that her disappointments as well as her successes mold her character and make her who she is.  They also teach her, along the way, just as mine taught me, that we don't always have to react to things which aren't as we think they should be.  And when all else fails, come home and cuddle with your cat.

Which is a great segue into an interesting dream last night.  I traveled to a foreign, perhaps Arabic, country with a man who, at first, seemed like he was going to kill off his siblings.  When we got there, we had to watch his two brothers who were in some kind of army, lying on the ground, dying of some unexplained ailment.  This prompted him to look around the small settlement trying to determine who was responsible.  There was some kind of martial law there, and if you didn't have a government issued tattoo on your arm, your movements were very limited.  He had a box containing various tokens and trinkets which allowed him access to places including the police station.  As I was a complete stranger to the country, I could only go where he went, otherwise, I was forced to remain in the town's center, and whenever I ventured out, armed guards forced me back.  Just at the edge of town was a building which was used to breed cats.  I was constantly drawn to this building and several cats were usually out on the grounds, and proved to be very friendly (could this have had something to do with Dylan sleeping on my head, Munchkin snuggled beside me and Loki walking across my body?).  Whenever I could, I would sneak away to just visit with the cats, and that always made me feel better.  At one point, my companion left the settlement to go in search of more information, leaving me there alone, thus, limiting my movements even further.  Sitting on a bench in the town's center, I had time to really look at my surroundings.  There were a series of bungalows on which was printed the building number (the one I recall most clearly was "Building 2") which had several doors leading into either rooms or full apartments.  I wasn't able to tell.  But each door was also numbered.  My companion eventually returned and I told him I hated him for leaving me there alone.  His trip had been successful, though, and he was able to identify the woman in the settlement who had killed his brothers.  At that point, Loki managed to turn my clock radio on to a rap station (don't ask me how!) and I woke up so I never learned the rest of the details.

As I sit here typing, Dylan is in his place on the desk, as he always is when I'm in here.  Loki, never one to be excluded, has actually settled down on the other chair.  I guess her tummy is finally full, though it took her share of a half can of wet food and another few minutes at the dry food bowl (from which she chased Dylan away with just a look!) before her round little tummy was finally satisfied.  Again I say, this is supposed to be a sick cat???  We need to talk to the vet about whether keeping her on the Azodyl is really doing anything any more. If not, why keep shoving pills down her throat?  We could just give her the potassium and be done with it.  I swear, she's going to outlive us all.  Of course, if what Dr. Stirewalt confirmed was true, she's the youngest of our current brood.  Dr. Barnes seems to think she's considerably older.  Who knows?  I certainly don't know how to tell the age of an adult cat.

I'm still mulling over the question "to Sedona or not to Sedona", but I think I'm leaning more towards going, which means that I'd best book my flight soon, before it goes up, as they tend to do lately.  I'm already mentally packing anyway, putting everything I'll need electronically in my laptop bag, including the gps and it's various pieces and parts from my car.  May as well give myself every advantage, eh?  

Love and Light.