November 16, 2012 Convoluted thoughts and dreams.

I woke up at about 2:30 AM from a very strange and disturbing dream.  I wouldn't exactly call it a nightmare because, despite the nature of the dream, I didn't ever really have a feeling of terror.  I did think to myself after looking at the clock "is that all it is?" because, had it been a few hours later, I would have just stayed awake.

In the dream, I was transported to a large warehouse in a big, military style helicopter.  Although there were other people with me, they seemed to be sort of on the periphery.  Inside the warehouse, I found myself shooting at what turned out to be dead people who kept reanimating and coming after me, trying to shoot me as well.  One of them dropped a gun because he couldn't get the bullets into it.  When I picked it up, I found that the bullets had a special piece on the back which had to be turned the right way in order for the bullets to load into the gun.  I also remember yelling "Don't do it, Lucy!" though I have no idea who this Lucy person might have been.  At one point, I ran out of the warehouse and was talking to some kind of law enforcement official, explaining that I got there in a helicopter, but the helicopter was nowhere to be found, and the feeling I got was that it had been blown up.

What is even more odd about this dream is that I am typing this about 15 hours after it woke me up, and still remember a lot of the details.  My experience has been that when I remember a dream vividly hours later, there is some kind of message I'm supposed to be getting from it.  As of this moment, I am absolutely stumped as to what kind of message this crazy dream was carrying.

Whenever I have these vivid, thought provoking dreams, a song from my childhood will pop into my head.  Although the song was written in about 1950 by Ed McCurdy, the version I remember was sung by Simon and Garfunkle.   The words are: 
Last night I had the strangest dream I ever had before. 
I dreamed the world had all agreed to put an end to war. 
I dreamed I saw a mighty room filled with women and men
And the paper they were signing said they'd never fight again.
And when the paper was all signed and a million copies made.
They all joined hands and bowed their heads and a million prayers were prayed.
And the people in the streets below were dancing 'round and 'round.
And guns and swords and uniforms were scattered on the ground.
Last night I had the strangest dream I'd never dreamed before.
I dreamed the world had all agreed to put an end to war.

While watching tv last night, I caught a couple of snippets about fighting between the Palestinians and Israel in Gaza again, and the internet contained more stories today.  I had also been talking to a friend about the Twilight movies which featuring the undead vampires.  Did my brain twist these two unrelated stories into one, oddly disjointed dream? 

It could be something not as easily related too.  I have noticed over the last few days that with the issue I'm trying to resolve, I seem to be attracting negative energy again, but now it is VERY uncomfortable!  It isn't necessarily getting inside my personal bubble.  Instead, it is just lingering around me and, vampire-like,  sucking the life out of my surroundings.  When I got home tonight, I think Dylan was very aware of it because he jumped up on the desk, put his nose up to my ear and cooed at me until I stopped what I was doing and just gave him my full attention.  Even now, he's rubbing against my legs and trying to distract me. 

Whatever is upsetting my personal continuum is really throwing me out of whack.  I couldn't really get into my dancing last night as I'm used to, and ended up leaving a little earlier than normal.  I feel almost like an old LP with the phonograph needle stuck in a scratch on my surface. 

When I sat down to meditate this afternoon, I was unable to call up images at will, but I did visualize a huge eye in the center of which was a section which kept changing shapes, first a heart, then an animal of some kind, then something else.  Staring into that eye, I sank further into my meditation and don't remember any other visualizations until I came out of it about 30 minutes later.

As usual, I am going to have to draw upon that patience which loves to elude me and just wait for more information before I figure this latest message out. 

My gratitudes tonight are:
1. I am grateful for Fridays!
2. I am grateful that so many people are reading my blog (over 2000 hits now!)
3. I am grateful for puzzles which make me open my mind to new lessongs.
4. I am grateful for the return of positive energy.
5. I am grateful for the holidays which give me a chance to fill my house with joy and laughter (and make me do some serious cleaning, much to the disgust of the resident furballs!)

Love and light.