November 9, 2012 And the wheel turns

This week started out rough and only got rougher as it progressed, but tonight made it all worth it and then some!  Had a quick dinner at Souplantation including a well-deserved dish of chocolate lava cake followed by an amazing performance of Seussical the Musical.  The professionalism this venue exhibits regardless of the show never ceases to amaze me.  And the talented singers, dancers and actors always knock my socks off.  Tonight was no exception, in fact, I think it was the best show I've seen so far!  And some of the performers couldn't have been more than 5 years old!!!  But what stage presence!  What voices!  What talent!!!  And the Cat was an absolute riot!!!  Horton made you laugh, made you cry and made you go "Awwwwww".  The birds fluttered, the monkeys caused mayhem as monkeys do.  I just can't say enough about the performance!  Thank you, High Street Theatre, for keeping the arts alive in Ventura County!!!  You do an amazing job and I, for one, will continue to support and promote you! 

I have to say, I'm as amped up after that performance as I am from a night of dancing, and don't see myself settling down to sleep for quite awhile.  And so, dear readers, brace yourselves for what may be one of my longest posts in awhile! 

Tonight I also congratulate myself for two days of keeping my cool with difficult people and a difficult situation.  For accepting that there are things I can't change, releasing my anger and frustration, and allowing other options to formulate.  I realized this week that it's not only my thoughts that I can manage this way, but also my actions and, even better, my RE actions!  There will always be difficult people in my life, but it's entirely up to me whether or not to allow them to affect my behaviour.

And speaking of difficult people, my wonderful son-in-law rescued my giant soup and potato pot from my darling, but ornery daughter.  When he went to retrieve it, she told him that she'd planned to keep it because she felt I was being petty.  We had a good laugh over that one!  She then offered Mathom her condolences for having to do mine and Heather's "dirty work".  Silly girl!  Mathom and I get along very well, and he loves my daughter to the moon and back!!!  Sadly, he also adores my granddaughter who adores him right back, but he, being the sensible sort he is, won't allow her mother to use her as a pawn, any more than I will.  Only the years ahead will determine how our relationships with Sera will evolve.  I am just very grateful that Jenni's boyfriend is in her life because he really does seem to want what's best for her, and gives her the love, affection and boundaries a real dad should.

That leads me to an interesting thought.  I've heard that the best love is the one with no boundaries, but I disagree.  I think that boundaries are necessary as part of our promise to protect each others' hearts.  Boundaries do not mean that the love isn't unconditional, they simply give us the opportunity to respect aspects of our loved ones which, whether we understand them or not, could prove hurtful if crossed.  Boundaries are understanding that despite the fact that our love binds us together, we are still individuals who need space to be individual.  We are not joined at the hip, nor should we be.  The paths we walk must sometimes be walked on our own, and other times, walked with others; people we love, people who mentor us and people for whom we are the mentor.  As we expand ourselves, we must be prepared to perform many roles because in each is a lesson which moves us further along our path, and sometimes, many lessons.

When my daughter was dating another young man a few years ago, she had to split herself between us because he and I didn't get along all that well, and he resented the attention she paid to anyone but him.  The man she married, on the other hand, is very sensitive to her need for "mom time" and as a result, we tend to include him more often than not, because he is comfortable to be with, has no trouble sharing her and carries no resentment.  He is comfortable with his place in her heart and has no need for her to keep proving it by ignoring others for his sake.  So in some cases, the boundaries may be blurred, but they are still there and must be respected for the love to thrive.  Respect is such a huge part of the equation too.  Sure, the boundaries are there, and it is up to us to be aware of them and appreciate them.  But respecting not only the boundaries but all aspects of another person takes us to a whole new level.

So my new focus will be to be aware of what my boundaries are because I can't expect anyone to respect them if I'm not clear as to what they are.  I am also going to try to be more aware of the boundaries of others, and to respect them as well.  But the other side of that is to be aware of when there are no boundaries, and to allow myself to get closer, and to allow others to do the same.

I will also be focusing more on loving and respecting not only those close to me, but those who are more challenging.  Respecting and loving the ones who are harder to respect and love offers me some really powerful lessons!

Finally, now that I have made a habit of writing in my blog, to the extent that I literally cannot go to sleep without posting at least a few sentences and my five gratitudes, it is time to start working on getting to the gym on a regular basis.  It is time to create another habit!  Wish me luck!

My gratitudes are:.
1. I am grateful for having established a habit which I have now honored religiously for nearly 3 months and over 900 blog hits!  Woo hoo!
2. I am grateful that I have progressed much more quickly than expected after knee surgery.
3. I am grateful for new and exciting opportunities.
4. I am grateful for the chance to establish more habits which will make me a better person and give inspiration to others as well.
5. I am grateful that tomorrow is massage day!

Love and light.